Me: Aren't you meeting your beau-to-be tonight?

The Roommate: No. He emailed me. He's sick. Whatever.

Me: Well, that gives you more time to rehearse your Julia Roberts Notting
Hill Speech. "I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to
@#$% her."

The Roommate: I think his canceling is divine intervention. Maybe it's
not meant to be.

Me: Maybe his kid pulled a Delia.

For the uninitiated: Delia is a character on Everwood. She is the nine year old
daughter of the widowed main character. Recently, she threw a hissy-fit
(even resorting to saying "the s word"!) in protest of her daddy's
friendship with a lady doctor. At the end of the episode, she apologized for her
brattiness but told her daddy dear he can date anyone he wants but never never
the lady doc.

Now I am totally embarrassed that not only have I publicly admitted I actually watch Everwood,
but have also used it in a pop culture vernacular way.

The Roommate: Maybe, but I think that would be over his head. The kid is just
5.

Me: Children grow up a lot faster today. When we were 5 we were playing
with Lincoln Logs and making mud pies. This kid can probably download The
Wiggles and Hilary Duff on his MP3 while building his own website entirely in
CSS that validates in XHTML.

Permalink | File Under: Chats

Things I Won't Miss About My Current Crack Pad Apartment

The fragrant combination of dog feces and cat urine the entire outdoors seems to
be bathed in.

Getting a contact high from my neighbor's open window.

Having an apartment facing the pool.

The toothless-in-need-of-a-shower pool guy.

Watching the morning news and seeing images of my apartment complex with a
report that 6 buildings (none were mine of course) were evacuated during the
middle of the night so police could arrest someone building a pipe bomb in their
apartment.

Uni.

Morning/evening traffic.

Things I Will Miss About My Current Crack Pad Apartment


*insert sound of crickets chirping.

Permalink | File Under: Ranting

So yesterday I'm leaving work and I'm really pissed about something that
happened that afternoon. I walk up to my car and see that yet another
person with a white car had dinged my car door with theirs and this just sends
me over the edge.

Time to break for a small confession: I tend to talk to myself while I'm
driving. It's usually how I vent any after-work anger I may have during my
drive home. It's sort of a way to cleanse my soul before I walk in the
door of my home, so that I don't bring work woes home with me. It's proven
quite effective.

Any way, so I'm bitching up a mad storm and I can feel my face is getting hot
and I'm actually yelling in my car all while I am cruising down the street with
all the other people going home after a hard day's work.

At some point, I glance at the jeep driving next to me and there is this guy in
the passenger seat staring at me in jaw gaping horror. When our eyes meet,
he immediately looks away and I see him mouth these words to the driver: this
guy is crazy.

Then they start to slow down, way down, to get the hell away from me
because they probably think I am on the verge of some sort of road rage meltdown
and don't want to be the victims of any havoc I may create.

It's at this point that I realize maybe I need to calm down just a wee
bit. Then I start cracking up over being caught yelling at now one in the
car.

I can only imagine that someone else must have seen me laughing hysterically by
myself, and they thought I was crazy too.

Permalink | File Under: Life

Before I rant I want to acknowledge one thing...Yes, I know it's only a TV
show.

During the first fifteen minutes of Sunday's episode of Alias, we see Weiss
helping Sydney move into her new digs. Here is my question: how does she
have anything to move? She's been missing for two years and her last place
mysteriously burned to the ground after her smackdown with Evil Francie. So, where did all this stuff come from?

And while I'm at it, how did she find a place so quickly? At the end of
the episode, she says she's been back for a little more than a week since waking
up in Hong Kong with no memory of the last two years. Suddenly she has
this great pad two blocks from the beach. Maybe this is a service the CIA
provides. Which would explain why she and Weiss are neighbors now. I
don't know about you but I spend enough time with the people I work with.
I don't particularly want to see them when I am at home.

And what's this crap about Will being in witness protection? Protection
from whom? What did he witness? Why does a CIA Analyst need to be
protected?

I'm so confused.

Permalink | File Under: Ranting

Hating

The American version of Coupling.
The writing for the revised pilot was flat and simply unfunny. The actors
have no chemistry and have created characters that are completely charm
free. Do yourself a favor and watch the
original on BBC America
(or PBS if in Arizona) or rent the DVD.
I could rant on and on about why it sucks but why when so
many others have done it for me.

Thinking

Why are the only two new shows (1,
2) I want to see this season on at the
same time?

I should be reading more and watching TV less.

Reading

Filthy:
The Weird World of John Waters by Robrt L. Pela. My favorite quote:
""I've always wanted to sell out. The problem is nobody wanted to buy
me."

The
Non-Expert: Broken Hearts by Choire
Sicha. Anyone who quotes Erykah Badu is okay by me.

Announcing

The
newest Maddi has arrived.

Permalink | File Under: Lists