I finally figured out what was screwed up with the permanent links in the
logs. (Yea for me!) Then I thought about the works "links in
the logs" and realized I could call them "link-n-logs". Get
it? I know, it's a groaner.

I've been working from home most of this week. I went into the office
Monday and just looked at the clock all day as I worked. Counting down the
minutes until I could leave. I still count down the minutes until I can
log off when I work from home, but at least I am already at home and don't have
to deal with anyone face to face.

I've been looking for a new job in The Company but have had no success.
There was a major hiring freeze during the fourth quarter, just like there is
every fourth quarter. So far the freeze has only thawed a little, because
there have barely been any postings. There was one that I called about but
it sounded so monotonous, I passed on it.

I need to start looking outside of The Company. I've been needing to do
this for a long time, but the trouble is 1) I have no idea what I want and 2) I
am going through a major lack of confidence in my job skills.

Last year I took the Strong Interest Inventory through ASU. The Strong
Interest Inventory assess your likes and dislikes and compares them with people
who have similar interests and are happy and fulfilled in their careers. I
wanted to get a better idea of possible career options. I've been working
as a technical writer of sorts for about 4 years. I used to enjoy my work
and excelled at it, but over the last year or so, I've grown to hate it.

To get my test results, I had to go to a interpretation session with one of the
graduate students. I sat in a room with about 7 other people, all of whom
were older than me. We talked about our past jobs and careers. Our
desires. Well, they talked. I had no interest in this
bullshit. Just give me my fucking results please, I kept
thinking. They withhold them until the end of the session, because they
know the minute you get that hot little report in your hands, you won't be
listening to anyone.

Finally, the grad student passes them out. We started on the first page
and he explained what the various scores represent. I'm listening and
following along until I notice the bottom of the first page. There is a
section that has the top ten Occupational Scales. These are the ten jobs
on which match my interests. What was at the top of the list?

Technical Fucking Writer.

I started to laugh. Of course, I thought. I'm best suited
for misery. I laughed again. I looked up to see everyone turned to look at me. My expression morphed from smiling to stern.
"Sorry," I said trying to look serious as I hid behind my
report.

As I left the building I called my friend Kristin to recount my experience using
as much dramatic flair and build-up to the punch line as I could. We
laughed. She said, "you know what this means right?" I
hadn't given it that much thought yet.

"You like what you do. You just hate where you are doing it."

She was right. I am so unbelievably unhappy at work. I feel like a
shell of myself when I am there. So it's time to dust off that resume and
give it a shiny new coat. Time to hit the virtual pavement and post that
sucker wherever I can.

I still have no clue what I want to do when I grow up, but at this point, I'll
consider anything.