Many moons ago, this guy wrote a post about his favorite movies and I've been meaning to the same ever since. When he said "I watched Lonesome Dove for like the thousandth time the other day," I could totally relate. I have certain movies that I watch over and over and never get tired seeing.

I have to say up front, there is a difference between movies I think are great and movies I consider my favorite. Schindler's List is a great film. I just don't want to see every day. These are movies that feel like old friends you don't see every day but when you do, you instantly feel comfortable and can pick up where you left off.

Party Girl - I have seen this movie what feels like a thousand times. No other movie has seeped into vernacular as this movie has, so much so that I refer to my favorite (former) co-worker as Buttercup. There is a reason the moniker "Party Girl" followed Parker Posey for so many years in the press, she's so fucking good in it. Now, if only they'd release a wide screen version of it, my life would be complete.

Nine to Five - This runs a close second to the impact it's had on my day-to-day life. To any one who's ever heard me say, "Atta girl," this is where it is from. It is horribly dated but still seems as fresh and funny each time I see it.

Le Fabuleux destin d'Amélie Poulain or as we like to call it here in the states, Amélie - I remember exactly what I felt when I first saw this movie in the theater. I felt like a child seeing snow for the first time. Or coming downstairs on Christmas morning and realizing Santa was real. This movie is pure magic and has hands down the best kiss in any movie ever.

A Christmas Story - I have to watch this movie every holiday. It's programmed in my DNA. The whole bit about the leg lamp is priceless and sadly, very close to home. More on that another day.

Mulholland Dr. - When I first saw this movie, I hated it...with a passion. But it haunted me and I went to see it again. And then again. Now I own it. I can't explain why I'm so transfixed on it. Maybe it's the hyper styling. Maybe it's Naomi Watt's brilliant performance. (She was ROBBED by the Academy I tell you!) Maybe it's Laura Harring breasts, which I gotta tell you, even though I like dudes, MAN OH MAN! Is she beautiful. Of course, Justin Theroux haunted my dreams for a while too. My favorite scene is one that made me laugh out loud the first time I saw it because I thought it was just sooooo over the top but now completely fascinates me, is Rebekah Del Rio's aching performance at Club Silencio.

Sweet Dreams and What's Love Got to Do with It - When you are in college, you tend to obsess about things. Two of my obsessions where Patsy Cline songs and I, Tina. Many nights were spent listening to Patsy's sad wail. (You can hear the heartbreak in her voice.) I read I, Tina so many times, my poor dog-eared copy didn't survive long. My favorite line from Sweet Dreams: "Look Charlie! A dishwasher! Queen of Sheba."

Heathers - Okay, so yeah, I know...Winona Ryder is the only one in the whole movie how looks like they could be in high school, but so what. This script was so amazing for it's time and today, it could never be made. The world has changed way too much, but back in 1989, they hit it on the nose.

Striclty Ballroom - Baz Luhrmann's first movie and the best use of Cyndi Lauper's "Time After Time".

Fight Club - When the movie starts, it grabs you by the collar and doesn't let go. It's wickedly funny and so damn brilliant. Helena Bonham Carter has the best entrance when she walks into the testicular cancer support group, smoking, and says, "This is cancer...right?" Why they keep sticking that girl in corsets for movies is beyond me.

I could go on forever but I'll stop there for now. I haven't even gotten to my favorite kind of movie, really, really bad ones. I have two words for you: Disco Godfather.

Comments (12)
Permalink | File Under: Lists, Movies

Since I've got a more time on my hands since becoming suddenly unemployed and recovering from snotty nosed septoplasty, I've been catching up on my blog reading. I'm ashamed to admit it but I've been rather lax on reading everyone's blogs. Not just certain ones, but everyone's. I've had quite a few conversations and IM chats that have included, "I blogged about that. Didn't you read it?" and then I'd hang my head in shame and say, "No. No I didn't. Would you please put yourself out for a moment and actually tell me what's going on in your life?"

So, it's been a while. Like, did you know Sissy SpaceChik stopped blogging?

Okay, it hasn't been that long, but here are some current observations.

• Just noticed MzOuiser has a new template including a link to her Blogger profile and a va-va-voom photo of her gorgeous self. Following her lead, I updated my "Occupation" listing on my Blogger profile.
• So Bob's apparently moving or something. Bullocks. Or has he moved already? (I'm a skimmer folks.)
• Zenleo is on hiatus. I hope not for long.
• Oh dear lord! Is it football season again? I have known Jennifer for a very long time. She is a lovely and amazing woman, mother and wife. She is also crazy obsessed when it comes to OU football. An obsession that both frightens and disturbs me even though I've never even been near her during a game, but I can imagine the intensity of such an event. I bet you a dollar she has one of those giant foam fingers somewhere or her ringtone plays Boomer Sooner. Really. One whole dollar.
• He sails, he sips wine on the beach, he jets off for top secret weekend getaways. How do you solve a problem like Ryanstask?
• For the record, I never asked to see it.
• Did you know Mark has a boyfriend? You'd never know from his blog. He's so private about it. (Just giving you some shit Boo Boo, Gawd bless ya. I heart you.)

Comments (7)
Permalink | File Under: Blogging

I just received a drunk dial from the Zenchick. You know it's truly a drunk dial when said dialer realizes it's a drunk dial in the middle of the conversation. "Oh my god! This is a drunk dial! I'm drunk dialing you."

Why yes. Yes you are.

I heard Aaron and MzOuiser in the background preparing a photo op when the Zenchick gave (shoved) the phone to this guy who immediately said, "You have no idea who this is, do you?"

Sure I do, I said. "You have a very tall head." The real question was, did he have any idea who I was?

Exhibiting the compassion and loving kindness you'd expect from someone who refers to herself as the Zenchick, she spent most of the call mocking my post surgical congested nasal voice tone. "What a minute. Say that again. (laughs) No really, say it again."

She truly is a vessel of love.

Actually, her mocking made me laugh. "It hurts when I laugh. Stop!" I said, which to a drunk dialer is only incentive for continuing to make me laugh.

You always hurt the ones you love. I think.

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Permalink | File Under: Life

Yesterday I had septoplasty surgery to correct a deviated septum. It was the first time I've had surgery as an adult. The only other surgery I've had was when I was in second grade and I had my appendix removed. Once they cut the organ out of me they discovered there was nothing wrong with it and I didn't need to have it removed. I didn't find that last little tidbit until five years ago. I love when my mother assumes I had a full working memory at the age of seven while on anesthesia. (Gah!)

Everything went fine yesterday. I'm happy to report that advances have been made in hospital gown so my big white ass was fully covered at all times. My doctor stopped by to answer any questions I had as did the anesthesiologist who was HOT. After meeting him, the only question I had was "do I really have to be put under for this?" while I batted my eyes.

I feel asleep while being wheeled to the OR and later woke up in post op where a nice woman named Evelyn gave me ice chips. She didn't mind my tons of questions: Did they put a tube in my throat or something? What did she have done? Can I have more ice chips please? Did the anesthesiologist ask about me? She also didn't seem to mind when I hummed to myself, which I do when high as a kite on pain medication.

The Roommate picked me up, took me home and watched over me for the rest of the day. At first I thought it was kind of annoying every time she reminded me to take my meds but then I realize I wasn't remembering when to take them. So her caretaking was much appreciated.

Today, I am feeling tons better groggy-wise and pain-wise, but I feel so gross. My nose is filled with bloody ooze. I have never had such an impulse to blow my nose than I have right now. But doing so would be very, very bad. They were quite forceful driving that point home.

So for the next week I can't breathe through or blow my nose. So besides looking like hammered shit with my bloody oozey nose that is all puffy from swelling and usually has gauze taped under it, I also sound ever so sexy.

Too bad I don't have a digital camera or audio blogger to share the joy.

Comments (0)
Permalink | File Under: Life

You've probably heard in the news about large companies who are downsizing their workforce during the fourth quarter. I work for one of those companies. Today, I was laid off.

It wasn't a complete shock. I've been with this company for a while now and watched lay offs happen just about once every year. This is the first year I felt like my job was at risk and what do you know...I was correct.

I have remained strangely calm today. I'm not sure if it is due to a zen-like perspective of knowing that everything works out the way it is supposed to or if I'm just in shock or denial. I'd like to think it's the former.

I see this as an opportunity. I've been very unhappy for a while now and have longed to find something new. This is sort of the nudge or push, I needed to get me going.

Fortunately, I do have a severance that will cover me for a few months. That helps with the calm. Of course, if I haven't found something by February, I will probably be wigging out.

Number 99 on my list of 100 things says "I believe the best is yet to come," and I do truly believe that. This happened for a reason. I can't wait to see where it leads me.

Permalink | File Under: Life

You should know four things before reading the following IM chat:

• For my birthday, Adam gave me a can of Maine's finest crab dip. (I'm not sure why. UPDATE: Adam says he did tell me why. He said it was because I don't travel and it's from the farthest place he's been to. Oddly enough, I don't remember this part of the gift giving conversation.)
• I am having minor surgery later this week to correct a deviated septum. (No, it is not a nose job. There are soooooo many other procedures I'd consider before touching my nose.)
• Adam is going as one of the Fanta Girls for Halloween. (I'm not sure why.)
• Adam and I have some fucked up chats.

Brian: i don't wanna go to work
Adam: me neither
Adam: and I won't!
Adam: muahaha!
Adam: not for 7 more days!
Brian: yea for you. boo for me.
Adam: aww.
Brian: but i only have to work 3 days
Brian: of course i'm having SURGERY after that. :-(
Adam: :(
Brian: if i don't make it...know i love you. :-(
Brian: and you can have the crab dip back to remember our friendship
Adam: LOL
Adam: oh hell no.
Adam: that shit's going in your coffin.
Brian: great
Brian: i'm being cremated. i don't want to be all dolled up for all to see
Adam: that's okay
Adam: we'll marinade you in it first
Adam: the flava will cook right in.
Brian: mmm...dead brian now in crab flavor
Brian: the cat will really like that
Adam: can I make you up like betty butterfield?
Brian: no, but you can make me up like mrs. butterworth
Adam: ewe
Adam: workin at the carwash
Adam: whoaoaoaoaoa
Brian: my funeral is just going to be a big pancake breakfast
Brian: held at the biz
Adam: LOL
Adam: creepy.
Adam: can we do karaoke too?
Brian: sure!
Brian: only if you sing abba
Adam: sos?
Brian: waterloo
Adam: argh
Adam: okay.
Adam: my my
Adam: at waterloo napoleon did surrender
Adam: oh yeah!
Adam: and I have met my destiny in quite a similar way
Adam: waterloo! I was defeated along the wall
Brian: see...you already know the words
Brian: and you can use your fanta girl wig
Adam: LOL
Adam: :D
Brian: everyone has to dress in drag at my pancake funeral...i mentioned that, right?
Brian: and we should have chris isaak there to "perform" if you know what i mean.
Adam: holy cripes.
Adam: why do we have to wait for you to die to have this party again?
Brian: i hope you aren't suggesting having me killed
Adam: lol!

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Permalink | File Under: Chats

So I get this email from a co-worker the other day asking me about something. The content of the email is fine, but the way it looks is hideous. He used some fucked up font with color with bolding WITH a small size. It looked like this:

Hey Brian: Since you are the smartest guy in the world, will you look into this for me? Thanks.

Reading his email reminded me of those posters that if you stared long enough at them, you'd see some hidden image. I had to cut and paste his email into plain text just the read the damn thing.

When I replied to tell him I'd look into what he wanted, I offered the following piece of advice:

Dude...about your email...the font, coupled with the size and color, make it very difficult to read and hard on the eyes.

So I'm not Mr. Super Professional. Sue me.

When he replied, it looked like this:

Thanks for looking into this for me. And thanks for the feedback about my email.

As Mark would say, *blank stare*.

Okay first off, is it fucking Christmas already? What's with the red and green? Also, he wears glasses, so you'd think he'd want to make his emails easier to read or at least...oh...I don't know....MIMIC THE BAZILLION OTHER PEOPLE IN THE COMPANY AND USE THE DEFAULT FONT! (At least he's easy on the eyes.)

So I replied back saying, "Please tell me you are joking with this font." and he replies back, "You don't like it? It's cute and fun." I then asked if they still made magnifying glasses and he made some weird joke how they aren't just for "frying ants" anymore and with that, I gave it up and now I leave you with this thought: Have a good weekend.

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Permalink | File Under: Ranting

I received an email this morning about a co-worker who passed away on Friday. Before I left work on Thursday for my mini Columbus Day extended weekend, I was told she was in the ICU and things looked grim. I didn't really know her personally, only professionally. Over the last several years, she and I have collaborated on many projects many of which were ongoing. Last week, I looked at my calendar to see it was time to make an update to one of our projects, I was saddened to realize she didn't remind me like she usually did and probably never would again.

A week ago, the mother of a friend of mine passed away. She lives far away and I longed to be there to help. Physically, actively help. I remembered seeing her mother at her wedding. There were so many people there, I never got a chance to say hello and introduce myself (the Old Brian? was too shy to say hello and introduce himself), but I watched her dance with her husband and dote on her daughter and I felt her love for all her children and grandchildren.

And of course, Christopher Reeve died on Sunday. I hope it doesn't seem inappropriate to say that when I was an adolescent, I had the biggest boy crush on him. Not just because he was Superman, but that didn't hurt. Seeing how he fought to recover and raised money and awareness after his accident, only solidified in my mind he was one of the good guys.

I don't really think about my own mortality a lot. I guess I'm of the "I could go at anytime" variety, not that I want to go anytime soon. Whenever I do go, I hope people will know I loved them and have fond memories of me.

Weeks ago, Patrick wrote a post about the list of things he wanted to do after he got sick. I've been working on my list since then. I ain't been easy. I'm not that ambitious. I guess the only way to get it done is just to do it. So here goes.

• Learn to skateboard


• Perform at an open mike night


• Learn to take and develop black and white photos


• Learn to knit a scarf (shut up!)


• Take a cross country road trip and meet all the friends I've never met


• Visit Savannah, Georgia


• Finish a writing project (blogging doesn't count)


• Attend the Austin City Limits Music Festival


• Go to amusement parks again


• Go on a hay ride and make a bonfire


• Have dinner in Greece, complete with dancing and throwing plates


• Make a stained glass window


• Watch a sunset from some place natural and beautiful


• Hike

Comments (0)
Permalink | File Under: Lists, Thinking

In this age of advanced electronics and geeked out high techy stuff, I'm sure I will encourage some snickering and possibly disgust and pity from some readers.

I write this blog on a PC that's about 8 years old. I bought it for fifty bucks. The little Intel inside sticker doesn't say Pentium 4 or III or even II, but "Pentium Pro", whatever the fuck that means. There is another sticker next to it that says Windows 95.

Have you finished bracing yourselves on the furniture from shock? Maybe you'll find some relief in knowing that the PC has been upgraded to Windows 98 and has some more RAM or memory or some kind of add on.

It's loud. I think it used to be housed in its own air-conditioned room before coming to stay here. Like most octogenarians, it needs to stop and rest for a while, usually while I'm in the middle of IM'ing someone or writing a wicked clever (or so I think) blog post. And of course sometimes, it just crashes for the hell of it. (A zen approach to my computer would be that it's teaching me patience.)

I'm also on dial up. I'm not even sure this thing could handle a cable modem, but I paid fifty dollars for the computer...do you think I'm going to shell out more than that each month for high speed internet?

I'm not completely in the dark with technology. I have a Pocket PC that is newer than my computer. Of course, I bought it on clearance and it's discontinued. I also can't connect it to my PC. But I can my work computer. It can play MP3s and shit, but since the battery is not meant to do that regularly, I rarely listen to it.

Time for further ridicule: I don't have a CD player in my car. It's a cassette player. I meant to get a CD player at some point, but do I need to remind you I only paid fifty bucks for the PC. Do you think my frugal purse strings are going to loosen for my car?

Before you jump to conclusions, I'm not cheap, just broke. I live on a very tight budget. So tight you could make a diamond out of a lump of coal, but obviously not really or else I wouldn't be broke because I'd be living off diamond sales.

So if you see the lights dim when I turn on my computer at night, know it's just me. Keeping it real. Circa 1996.

Comments (4)
Permalink | File Under: Life

ME: Hey. I need to have a word with you.

DICK: Who me?

ME: Yes you.

DICK: Oh. Okay. Let me just finish what I'm doing.

ME: No no no no no. This can't wait. I need to talk to you now.

DICK: Gah. What's your damage Heather?

ME: You are my damage Heather. We need to get something straight. You do not do the thinking for me.

DICK: Whatever Dude. I'll do what I want.

ME: And that's the problem. You do whatever you want without thinking about the consequences. Show some impulse control.

DICK: You show some impulse control you pansy.

ME: (to Brain) Hey you! Wake the fuck up. This concerns you too.

BRAIN: (groggy) Wha? Huh? Another five minutes mom.

ME: Wake up dumbass. You've been sleeping on the job.

BRAIN: I'm tired. Can we do this some other time?

ME: No! You need to start pulling your weight around here. Get off your lazy ass and start doing what you are supposed to.

BRAIN: (whines) But it's too hard and complicated. It's easier for him. He's got a simpler system in place.

DICK: Two against one dude. You're screwed.

ME: Shut up. You aren't the boss of me.

DICK: Au contraire mon frair. I beg to differ.

BRAIN: (snickering)

ME: You think that's funny?

BRAIN: Well...yeah. (snickering)

ME: What am I going to do with you two?

DICK: Are we done here? I got shit to do.

BRAIN: And I want to get back to my nap.

ME: Oy.

Comments (0)
Permalink | File Under: Chats

ME: Did I tell you about my date last Friday?

DEEK: Did he try to order for you?

ME: Ha ha. No. He had dirt under his fingernails.

DEEK: Landscaper?

ME: Software engineer.

Note to potential gentleman callers: Wash your hands including under your fingernails.

ME: He also avoided eye contact with me during the entire date.

DEEK: Where was he looking?

ME: At the invisible person to my right.

DEEK: Maybe he has a lazy eye.

ME: Maybe he has two lazy eyes.

Note to potential gentleman callers: Make some eye contact for chrissake.

DEEK: Maybe he was nervous.

ME: I think he was. He was sweating a lot.

Note to potential gentleman callers: Do I really need to say it?

DEEK: Did you have anything to talk about?

ME: Only because I guided the whole conversation. After about five minutes, I switched to practice dating mode. Brushed up on my conversation skills. It was hard because I was so not into being there.

Note to potential gentleman callers: Don't make me ask all the questions.

ME: Bottom line. There was no chemistry.

DEEK: You can't fake that.

ME: Nope. I had more chemistry with the guy I passed on the way to the bathroom.

Note to self: Try to be more subtle when checking out other guys while on a date.

Comments (0)
Permalink | File Under: Chats, Dating