The place I work subscribes to a bunch of magazines for the break room. The other day I thumbed through a couple of the entertainment ones while I ate my lunch. Kirstie Alley has been getting a lot of press for her new comeback series Fat Actress. On paper it seems like a pretty shrewd concept: poking fun at one's self and Hollywood's ridiculous obsession with the thin and beautiful, however I'm not sure how entertaining I would find watching someone fish burger crumbles out of her cleavage.

For those of you who haven't seen me—or are blind—I am fat. Now's the part when my not-fat friends chime in to say, "Oh Brian, you aren't fat!" It's very sweet of them to lie like that, but it's true. Now don't get me wrong, no one's gonna have to cut a hole in the side of the house so I can be loaded on a flatbed and taken in for gastric bypass surgery any time soon, but when your doctor gingerly says to you, "I'd like to talk to you about your weight," you are fat.

On some levels I accept my size. Even if I were to lose a ton of weight, I'd still be considered a big guy. I'm tall and have a broad frame. I've never expected to be any less than what I should be. I've only wanted to be healthy.

So for the last few years, I've made a lot of changes to my diet. I've added some things. I've taken away some things. At the beginning of the year, I got more serious about watching what I ate. It was a struggle. It's ALL I thought about. I treated it the same as when I quit smoking (which of course, I gained weight from) and focused on it intently. I eventually lighten up a little about it, but it's still on the forefront of my mind.

As for exercise, we have a difficult relationship. I fell out of going to the gym regularly a few months ago and haven't worked my way back into the habit. It will happen again, but for now let's just say I'm on a hiatus.

I should also mention I don't own a scale. The Roommate™ does but I rarely use it. I'd rather hear it from my doctor and let me tell you when he said, "you've lost twelve pounds over the last three months," I thought I might dry hump him right there.

That's right...12 POUNDS! It's not gonna land me on the cover of People Magazine with a before and after shot, but I'm pretty happy about it. To celebrate I ate a half gallon of ice cream. Okay, not really, but I did allow myself to have pizza and it was the best damn pizza EVER.

And then I threw it up.

Kidding again.