I was surprised to find a message waiting on my phone this morning since there wasn't one when I went to bed last night.

I was even more surprised to hear it was a 2 AM booty call.

Unfortunately the message was for Wendy — the previous owner of my cell phone number — not me.

I am sick of getting this bitch's calls.

Not only is Wendy apparently a slut, but she also doesn't pay her bills. I know this because for the first three months I had this number, I received daily phone calls from Cox Communications and various creditors looking for her.

The creditors eventually stopped calling, but now I guess I'll be getting late night booty calls from lonely drunken straight guys.

Maybe there is a silver lining to this.

Hmm.

I wonder if that slut Wendy and I have the same taste in guys.