Flare Burn
What do you see?
What do you see?
Initially I was going to title this post, "Drowning," but then I thought, "Oh THAT'S melodramatic, Mary. Dial it back a few clicks." Next thing you'll know, I'll start quoting Virginia Woolf and taking long, solitary walks down by the river.
You can stop rolling your eyes now. I have.
My head is full of thoughts lately. Bobbing up and down, colliding into each other. Bouncing on the surface. There's so much going on in there and yet it feels like so little.
So many things I don't want to think about.
Not yet.
And then a little treasure pops on my screen and reminds me it's not so bad after all.
And here's a little something something for you to say thanks for visiting my blog, even when I have very little to say.
When I sit down to write lately, my writing is either full of anger or maudlin pathos. Mostly, because that's what I've been feeling for a while: pissed, worn out and melancholy.
I know one shouldn't stifle those feelings and trust me when I tell you, there ain't nothing stifled about me lately. People know I'm going through some shit. It shows. And I also know there is a relief to letting it out, even on a blog. But right now, I don't want to be that guy. (Not that that's stopped me before.)
And really... who wants to read that kind of crap any way?
So instead I've been going through an exercise today. Today is about focusing on those moments that pull me away from that cluttered, noisy room. The moments I see light from the outside, breaking in through the dirty windows.
It can be a song on my iPod so compelling that makes me stop and listen. The combination of the warm sun and cool breeze on my skin as I walk outside. A smile from a stranger. Watching my cat sleep.
Rosie O'Donnell calls it yellow. Until today, I never understood what she meant by it. But now I get it.
When I find myself in those moments, I stop and relish it. Submerse myself in it. Let it work its mojo on me.
And for that moment, I'm no longer tired. No longer angry. No longer sad.
"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that."
-Martin Luther King, Jr.
to save our lives you've got to envision
and to save all our lives you've got to envision
the fiery crash
Ahh yes. The wonderful world of color halftones, gaussian blurs, layers and blending options. I'm actually in there somenwhere, pixelated and all.
I really need to get a hobby or something.
Here's another one.
Thank you for your kind comments about Anne Heche. She appreciates them too.
I've been drawing cartoons of my friend Mary Mo's cat. Her cat's name is Duchess. I told her that name isn't befitting a cat with her psychotic nature. Therefore, I renamed Duchess. I call her Anne Heche.
This was the first cartoon. Against my advice, Mary Mo lets Anne Heche go out onto the patio in the morning. Guess what happens now. Anne Heche wants to go outside ALL THE TIME now.
Anne Heche has yet to learn portion control and eats all her food in one sitting leaving her to bitch about it for the rest of the day.
Mary Mo has a basil plant that grows like a weed. Apparently Anne Heche has taken a liking to it.
I'm not sure this one needs any explanation. Poor embarrassed Anne Heche.
